Light therapy

Yesterday I received my light therapy lamp. I ordered this lamp a month ago thinking it would stave off the winter blues and lethargy. When I say winter blues, I mean psychopathic tendencies.  Of course a month ago I was a little more optimistic than now, and had a little more energy to complain about the long delivery delay.  During the waiting period I have murdered three dreams and seven expectations (not my own of course).

I plugged in the lamp and put it on my desk and was sitting there with anticipation, waiting for instant renewal of energy and life. When nothing instantaneously happened I decided to read the instruction manual.  Well, according to the manual, the effects would happen in 2 to 4 days.  While waiting for 2 to 4 days I could conceivably do something that could really harm my fellow man, like eating a big bowl of red bean chilli and then taking the metro, sensitive noses be damned!  Or even worse, I could feed a box of oysters to my partner and let him take the metro. In the world of smelly bodily functions, chilli is gunpowder, oysters are nuclear fuel rods!

Since December first, there has been a total of 3 days of full sunshine. I have tried to coerce the winter gods by beating snow banks bloody, erasing snow angels, and even kidnapping snowmen, in order to ransom some sunshine, but to no avail.  The snow banks just got bigger, the snow angels just keep reappearing (freaking kids!), and the snowmen, well, who would pay a ransom for something they could build themselves, or even easier, just wait until some kids build again?  Bad planning all around!

So here I sit, absorbing canned happiness and energy provided by my magic lamp, waiting for my soul to once again fit my skin.